


Fallen Apart and Put Together

by mggislife2789



Category: Criminal Minds, Spencer Reid - Fandom
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, F/M, Panic Attacks, Social Anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-02
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-19 01:20:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8183470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mggislife2789/pseuds/mggislife2789
Summary: After the reader, who suffers from social anxiety, comes home from a party, she suffers an anxiety attack. Her boyfriend, Spencer, is there to comfort her.Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or their original stories. This is only for fun. It's where my brain goes after the credits roll. No copyright intended. Better safe than sorry. ;)





	

Spencer had convinced you to go to this party tonight - and although you’d had a decent time, you were exhausted and completely overwhelmed. You knew almost no one at this party, so you stuck to your friend’s side the entire night. 

You had no desire to go really - work had exhausted you and you were not good in social situations, especially the kind where you knew no one you were interacting with, but Jenna was one of your oldest friends and you knew Spencer was right when he said you should go for her sake.

He’d promised you before you left that he would be home so you could talk out the whole experience once it was over, which was one of the only things that allowed you to leave the apartment - knowing that you had someone at home who understood your anxiety was very comforting. At least enough to get you to go to the party.

As you walked up the stairs to your apartment, you could feel an anxiety attack coming on. Your mouth was dry, you were short of breath and your heart was racing. You turned the key in the lock and opened the door to see Spencer on the couch. Without a word, he got up to give you a hug, knowing you needed the calming embrace of someone you loved to get you through what was slowly rising in your system.

“I feel like I know the answer to this question,” he started, a tinge of humor in his inflection, “but how did the party go?”

You wanted to be able to laugh, but your anxiety wasn’t allowing it. A sharp breath rose and fell in your chest, “I tried to distract myself while I was there. I was on the phone a lot and pretty much only talked to Jenna, so it wasn’t too bad while I was there, but once I got in the car, everything just started to fall apart.”

Spencer picked you up around your waist and brought you over to the couch, sitting you in his lap, so you could continue your conversation in comfort. “I’m sorry, Y/N,” he soothed, stroking your hair; it tended to calm you. “What do you mean falling apart? Walk me through it.”

All you wanted to do was sleep, but you curled yourself into him and tried to recall everything that happened after you’d left. “Once I got in the car my hands started sweating. All I kept thinking was that everyone was judging me. I tripped over myself at one point and everyone just stared at me. Jenna probably doesn’t ever want me to come to a party again.” You started to ramble, which always happened before you started to cry during one of your panic attacks.

Spencer cradled your head against his chest as you began to cry and continued to recount the events of the evening. “Jenna and I are unlikely friends, you know?” He shook his head. He did know. You and Jenna met in graduate school when you were her TA, so there was a gap between your ages and in your temperaments. She was much more of a party girl than you were, not that you didn’t know how to have fun, but you didn’t party often. Social situations energized her - they drained you. “I just kept thinking I didn’t belong there. Like everyone was looking at me and asking what the hell I was doing there. Every time I opened my mouth I felt like an idiot, like I had nothing to contribute to the conversation. I just wanted to sneak out unnoticed, but I didn’t want to disappoint her.”

You pushed the hair back from your face, which had fallen into your tears and matted to your face. When you looked up at Spencer, he kissed you on the forehead and grabbed a tissue from the box on the table, wiping away your tears. “Well, it’s over now and you don’t have to do it again for a while.”

“Thank god for that. I can only handle so much social interaction and I’d rather hang out with your friends. They’re more my speed,” you remarked, straddling your boyfriend’s lap. “And thank you.”

He looked confused, “Thank you for what?”

You pressed your lips to his, easing into a deep, comforting kiss. “Thank you for being you. You don’t judge me or my overreacting when it comes to all this. You just sit there and listen.” 

He took your chin in his hand and returned the kiss, replying, “You may feel like it’s overreacting, because your anxiety says that what you’re feeling isn’t valid, but the realness, immediacy and overwhelming intensity of your feelings during those moments of helplessness and desperation cannot be overemphasized.”

You chuckled, pressing your forehead to his, “I love it when you sound like a textbook. It’s so cute.”

“I try,” he joked, “Are you feeling any better now?” He pulled you closer to him.

You couldn’t thank the powers that be enough for bringing him into your life. He was exactly what you needed. “Yea, thanks to you. You always know how to put me back together.” You kissed him again, gently exploring his mouth with your tongue. “I know something else that could make me feel much better though,” you said, deepening the kiss.

He responded by placing his hand under your shirt and running his fingers down your spine, knowing the sensation always gave you the best kind of chills. “Oh, really? I think I might be able to help you there.” Knowing exactly what you needed, he grabbed your head in his hands and kissed you hungrily, like you were anything and everything he needed. A large part of your anxiety was that nobody wanted or needed you in their life, so it was amazing to feel so wanted and needed by him.

Hungry kisses turned into you slowly grinding down on his lap, desperate to get rid of the barriers between - until there was nothing but skin on skin. You put your hands under his t-shirt to lift it over his head, “Wanna go inside? I think I feel better now.”


End file.
